London Bridge is falling down,
Falling down, falling down,
And the reason that its falling down
Built by Wimpy
Saturday, 26 February 2022
PUT DOWN # 30
Put downs work the best
For deflecting
unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the
tension
When he sidles up to
you with his pick up line
Before he has chance
to deliver it
Just say to him
“Nice cologne, but did
you have to marinate in it?”
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – POLYHYMNIA (MUSE OF HYMNS)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the
arts
The sixth was,
The divine Polyhymnia,
The one of many hymns,
Was the Muse of sacred
poetry and sacred hymns
Of eloquence and
pantomime
In her long cloak and
classical pose
Polyhymnia was a
serious, pensive and meditative muse
LIFE’S HIGHWAY # 2
It seems that no matter which road I travel
As soon as I turn onto
it the road works begin
They always get there
before me with one exception
There are never any
problems on the road to ruin
SHEEPISH
A man walked into his bedroom
Where his wife was
preparing for sleep
And stood in the
doorway
Holding a leash
attached to a sheep
“Sweetheart when you
have a headache
This is the cow I make
love to”
The wife looked at him
with utter contempt
Then took his silence
as her cue
Saying “If you weren't
such a numbskull,
You’d know that's not
a cow it’s a yew
He replied “If you
weren't so conceited
You’d realise I wasn’t
talking to you”
STAY, STAY, STAY
Conscious of the danger to an animal
Being left inside a
parked car
A woman opened the car
window
So, her puppy could
get some air
But the little pup saw
the open window
As a route to escape
the car
And the woman had to
stop
Before she had got
very far
She stood and pointed
at the dog
Firmly saying stay,
stay, stay
A woman of the blonde
persuasion
Was watching her from
some distance away
But she had to keep
repeating it
Until she felt it safe
to go
The blonde woman
shouted to her
“You can use the hand
brake you know”
DOPEY BROTHER
My brother has a really bad habit
He smokes pot to
excess you see
When he needs more
from his dealer
He picks up the phone
and hits the hash key
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