The highways department have decided
In a review of speed
management
To replace the current
Traffic calming
measures
No more speed bumps
Or chicanes
Flashing road signs or
traffic cameras
No bollards or over
painted road surfaces
A newer cheaper
alternative has been found
To promote road safety
So, the highways dept
have decided
Just to stop repairing
potholes
Because they really
slow drivers down
It seems that no matter which road I travel
As soon as I turn onto
it the road works begin
But it’s not the road
works themselves I mind so much
It’s that they’re
never filling the bloody Potholes in
It seems that no matter which road I travel
As soon as I turn onto
it the road works begin
They always get there
before me with one exception
There are never any
problems on the road to ruin
No matter which road I decide to travel along
Road works have got
there before me it seems
I think it’s part of a
new government initiative
“The dig up the roads
to cause congestion scheme”
If anyone is wondering where all the traffic cones, personnel barriers and sundry mobile street signage have gone I can now reveal their whereabouts.
They are currently to
be found on every Road, Street, Lane and Close in Woking.
Some barriers stand
sentinel around abandoned holes in the ground, while cones are to be found
either in ones or twos making potholes or broken drains or in uniform rows
blocking off perfectly serviceable lanes for weeks on end for no apparent
reason.
We also appear to have
all the temporary traffic lights in the land and so numerous are they that they
rival, in number, the towns Christmas lights.
