21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 247

 

John Cook was riding down the road

Pedalling fast

He hit a pothole

And has ridden his last

ARE YOU WEARING HANDCUFFS?

 

Are you wearing handcuffs?

What have you been arrested for?

You saw a dress in the shop window

And it was cheaper than before

So, you decided to try it on

And that’s what you’ve been arrested for?

Trying on a dress in the shop window?

You tried it on in the window of the store

WINE BOXES AREN’T FOR THE SNOBS

 

Wine boxes aren’t for the snobs

But what makes them unwhackable

Is unlike the odd shaped bottles

All the Wine boxes are stackable

THE EBOLA CRISIS IS CAUSING CONCERN

 

The Ebola crisis is causing concern

And is causing the Americans to fret

And what the people want to know

Is why aren’t their troops there yet

ON HOLIDAY IN THE WEST COUNTRY

 

On holiday in the West Country,

During a recreational pursuit

I discovered that Plymouth Hoe

Was not a Devonian Prostitute

PLAYING "LA CUCARACHA"

 

Playing "La Cucaracha"

I hear the chimes call

Come get our hot food

Come one and come all

It’s the cockroach song

Is no one concerned at all?

IT’S YOUR OWN TIME YOU’RE WASTING

 

“It’s your own time you’re wasting”

But no one listens to the teacher

So, when option time came around

I went and signed up for media