WRITING JOKES FOR COMICS

 

I sit alone in a room

Writing jokes for comics

To earn my money

But on my own I wonder

If I’m the only person on the planet

Who thinks it's funny

So riddled with self-doubt

I’m terrified of finding out

WHEN I WAS IN A WRITING TEAM

 

When I was in a writing team

We was write a gag and get a laugh

Now it’s just me and a word processor

And it's hard to make the bastard laugh

I DISCOVERED MY FAVOURITE DUCK WAS SICK # 3

 

I discovered my favourite duck was sick

Unfortunately, he had a monkey on his back

It turned out he used a multitude of drugs

But his favourite drug of choice was Quack

I THINK IT’S MISOGYNISTIC

 

I think it’s misogynistic

To use the word misogyny

I’m not being pedantic but

It should be ms-ogyny

I SAW A MARMITE TRUCK THE OTHER DAY

 

I saw a Marmite truck the other day

Driving down the motorway

And I bet my mate ten pound

That it was heading yeast bound

THERE IS AN ABBA TRIBUTE BAND

 

There is an ABBA tribute band

Only three members but well above par

They work in a French slaughterhouse

And call themselves, Abba trois

TWO CLOWNS DIVORCED

 

Two Clowns divorced

And it was a very messy to do

As they all stood and watched

The Custardy battle ensue