IN THE WELL OF THOUGHTS

 

In the well of thoughts

The wordsmith dips his cup

In search of inspiration

And drinks deep the draught

But when the spark is struck

The muse was present

At the moment of conception

POETS OF YORE

 

Great poets, wordsmiths of yore

Prose and rhyme did write

Of matters that went before

Viewing them in poetic light

WHO IS ANNE ADCOCK?

 

The very acerbic Anne Adcock

Who seems to appear adhoc

In order to criticize or knock

 

Seems to appear out of nowhere

Materializing out of the ether

Leaving no way to contact her

 

She hides behind her anonymity

Like the Scarlet Pimpernel maybe

Or perhaps she is actually a he

 

She protects the sacred grammar

Never knowing when to expect her

She’s like the Pimpernel in that manner

 

They seek her here

They seek her there

They seek Ms Adcock everywhere

Is she in hiding?

Or is she not

That darned elusive Anne Adcock

CULTURE VULTURE

 

Isn’t culture wonderful?

Music, theatre, poetry

Something for everyone

To feel or hear or see

The performing arts

I particularly like poetry

Especially poetry readings

With the writer at the mic

I go to festivals and slams

From time to time

I like to go to a recital

And ask why the poem doesn't rhyme

WRITING JOKES FOR COMICS

 

I sit alone in a room

Writing jokes for comics

To earn my money

But on my own I wonder

If I’m the only person on the planet

Who thinks it's funny

So riddled with self-doubt

I’m terrified of finding out

WHEN I WAS IN A WRITING TEAM

 

When I was in a writing team

We was write a gag and get a laugh

Now it’s just me and a word processor

And it's hard to make the bastard laugh

WRITER CHARLES DICKENS

 

Writer Charles Dickens

Kept in his kitchen

The best of thymes,

The worst of thymes

I BOUGHT THE WORLD'S WORST THESAURUS

 

I bought the world's worst thesaurus

And it’s irredeemable

But it really is the worst

But not only is it terrible, it's terrible

TAHOMA AND CALIBRI

Tahoma and Calibri walked into a bar

And were told, “you will have to leave I fear

But please don’t take it personally

It’s just that we don't serve your type in here” 

MY POETIC LICENSE

 

Something has happened

That I don’t think is nice

Because my poetic license

Has been revoked, Twice

WHEN YOU ARE WRITING A STORY

 

When you are writing a story

About losing your virginity

Please do one thing for certain

And put it in the first person

POETRY IS REMARKABLE

 

Poetry is remarkable for

The amount of joy it brings

But please poets, we do get it,

Things are like other things

A MANUSCRIPT IS ALWAYS CALLED AN MS

 

A manuscript is always called an MS,

After the prospective Authors submit,

By the publishing house because that

Is the state the receiving editor finds it

MY POETIC LICENSE

 

Something has happened

That I don’t think is nice

Because my poetic license

Has been revoked, Twice

I LAUNCHED A NEW BOOK

 

I launched a new book,

Aimed at children, today

And I hit one of the little sods

Before they ran away

I LOST MY THESAURUS TODAY

 

I lost my thesaurus today

It was after the exam

I can’t find the words to describe

How upset I am

21ST CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES

21^st Century Nursery Rhymes

I really find are such a doddle

Though most people think

That they are a load of twaddle

But as I rapidly approach

The autumn of my days

It’s frankly just too late

For me to change my ways

DERUM

 

Derum, sorry if I’ve caused offence

I will desist from this moment hence

I received instructions from the Ed

“Give as good as you get” is what was said

WHATS IN A NAME (22)

 

Does anyone know if Ralph Coates?

Does anyone know if Brenda Totes?

Does anyone think is Donna Tart?

Would you know is Maxwell Smart?

OH GOODY

My wish is to get my poems published

And not because I want to be paid

And I will just have to persevere

Until I manage to make the grade

I will give up trying however, if I see

A book of verse written by Jade