72 Miles From The Sea

Sunday 26 September 2021

At my advanced age

I don’t worry too much about

Avoiding temptation

It will avoid me without doubt

I want to be friends with all

Of the alphabet and I really try

But I have only managed

Twenty-five, I don’t know Y

I got a Birthday card today

And it was full of rice again

I knew instantly why, because

It was from my Uncle Ben

The MSM gets me down

With their depressing lament

So, I am avoiding the news

Like the plague at the moment

If you are struggling to buy toilet roll

Find a suitable alternative if you can

And one appropriate solution would be

To wipe your arse with the Guardian

It was pitiful to see the calibre

Of the new fast-tracked inspector

I would say he was about as much use

As rubber lips on a woodpecker

Breaking news, a Theme Park

For the Teletubbies is planned

But it only features one of them

It’s to be called Laa-Laa Land