LIGHT ON HIS FETE

 

My brother is dyslexic,

Which is a bit of a trial

And I also think he’s gay

But he’s still in Daniel

A ROSE BY ANY OTHER NAME

 

In France, they don’t call it a pothole

Instead, they call it a hen’s nest

It sounds much nicer, doesn’t it?

But for drivers, they’re still a pest

SENIOR SPEED

 

People speed

For many reasons

Some are disorganised,

Some are late,

Some are impatient,

Some have no sense of direction,

For some it’s an emergency

That fuels their urgency

But for me, as a retiree

I have to drive fast

To get there before I forget

Where it is I’m going

YOUNG AT HEART

 

Young at heart

Well, that’s a start

You’re only as old as you feel

Isn’t that the deal?

Well in my heart I feel young

But when all said and done

Being young at heart, let’s face it

Still means you’re older in other places

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 58

 

Horsey, horsey don't you stop

Just let your feet go clippetty clop

Make the whip swish close up the ground

Win the race or your dog food bound

SEXUAL PREFERENCES # 6

 

I don’t have a favourite,

I love each and every one

Whether happy or sad

Cheerful or glum

 

I love Grim Kim

And Moanie Toni

Henpecky Becky

And Naggy Maggie

 

I love Bella Stella

And Indie Lindy

Funny Honey

And Windy Cindy

 

I love Tarty Marti

And Burley Shirley

The Felon Helen

And that twirly girlie

 

I love Flabby Gabby

And Escapee Lee

Chardonnay Kay

And Meat free Fi

 

I love Prudy Judy

And Racy Macy

Pristine Christine

And Straight Lacy Tracy

IN CASE OF EMERGENCY

 

Whenever my wife fills in a form for me

And it asks who to notify in an emergency

She always writes down her name, what for?

I don’t want her called, she’s not a doctor