MAMIL IS AN ACRONYM

 

MAMIL is an acronym

For “Middle Aged Men In Lycra”

I have to confess that’s not the word

I use for an old peddle cycler

SNAGS IS AN ACRONYM

 

SNAGS is an acronym

For “Sensitive New Age Guy’s”

But don’t all men come with snags?

Just like turds come with flies 

WHY CAN'T YOU RUN THROUGH A CAMP?

 

Why can't you run through a camp?

Because that would cause grammatical offence

You cannot run through a camp at all

It would obviously “be ran” because it's past tents

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 17

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some make me chuckle

Some make me glum

For example

Hamburgers = Shergars Bum

WORDS ARE VERY IMPORTANT

 

Words are very important

Encyclopaedia is one I like

But it doesn’t actually mean

A kiddie fiddler on a bike

DICTIONARIES AND LEXICONS

Dictionaries and Lexicons

Are crucial to most authors

And we all wonder if there’s

Another word for Thesaurus 

PORTMANTEAU

 

I was looking for a word

That summed up slogan or motto

But something more pithy

In the end I settled on Slotto

CONSIDER THE POSSIBILITY

 

In the event that your nose runs

And your feet smell

Just consider the possibility

That you might be upside down

ABBREVIATED IRONY

 

I have often thought it ironic

If not positively absurd

That the term, abbreviated

Is an eleven-letter word

WYNNE OR NO

 

Do you know who invented the crossword?

I can't remember his name for the life of me

It’s on the tip of my tongue just out of reach

It’s W something N something E

I ONCE WROTE A NOTE

 

I once wrote a note

Writ on paper, hue of oat

Not of literary note

Worth less than a groat

Full of unimportant quote

Not worthy to promote

No ego should it bloat

No means to gloat

But it got my vote

 

The note I wrote

I put in my coat

The coat that I tote

The one on which I dote

The one with stoat

About the throat

My favourite coat

Now held my note

 

But I left the coat

That housed my note

Upon a boat

“The rampant goat”

That was afloat

In a bay remote

The note, the coat,

And the boat did float

 

So where was my note?

Memorized by rote

In my favourite coat

With throat of stoat

Floating like a mote

On some distant boat

With no shelter of cote

The note, the coat,

On that blasted boat

I WOULD IF I COULD

 

I would if I could

But I can’t so I shan’t

How good if I should

But I can’t which I grant

If I could I know I would

But I can’t so I shan’t

Oh, how good if I should

But I chant I can’t, I can’t

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 16

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some are droll

Some hurt your sides

For example

Election results = let's recount lies

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 15

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

They are fun

By varying degrees

For example

This is funny

For the Yankees

Snooze alarms = alas! No more z 's

But if you happen to have

A British head

Snooze alarms = alas! No more z 's

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 14

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some make me chuckle

Some make me titter

For example

Mother-in-law = woman Hitler

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 13

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some make me chuckle

Some make my sides split

For example

Desperation = a rope ends it

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 12

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some are funny

Some have flair

For example

Astronomer = moon starer

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 11

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some make me chuckle

Some make my sides ache

For example

The earthquakes = that queer shake

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 10

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some make me chuckle

Some leave me red faced

For example

A decimal point = I’m a dot in place

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 9

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some are serious

Some are fun

For example

Eleven plus two = twelve plus one