EXCUSE MISS

Reading these excuse notes written to schools

You would think them maybe written by fools

Teachers will view these examples with disgust

I.e., Tom was absent because he missed his bust

Some are misspelled some are worse moreover

Gill was absent yesterday as she had a gangover

Dear Skool, Please ekscuse John Bird

For being absent from the 28^th to the 33^rd 

My son is under a doctor's care and so Jim

Should not take PE today. Please execute him

John has been absent from the school place

Because he had two teeth taken out of his face

Carlos was absent yesterday because to start

While playing he was hurt in the growing part 

Dear school Please excuse Gloria Palmer-King

From Jim class today because She is administrating

Please excuse my daughter little Lisa Trott

For being absent, she was sick and I had her shot

Please excuse Roland from PE for today

He fell from a tree and misplaced his hip, yesterday

Megan could not come to school (the note explains)

Because she has been bothered by very close veins

Dear Skool about my son Christopher Hyde

He’ll not be in school cus he has an acre in his side

Can you Please excuse my son Ray Howell’s

From school today because He has very loose vowels

Please excuse Tommy for being absent this week

But he’s had bad Diarrhoea and his boots leak

Sally won't be in school a week from Friday

We have to attend her funeral on that day

Please excuse the absence of Jason Cromwell

Yesterday He had a cold and could not breed well

My daughter was too tired for school it seems

That She spent a weekend with the Marines

Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday

Because She was in bed with gramps all day

Please excuse my daughter Martina Proctor

Because she has been sick under the doctor

Just one more excuse that’s worth its salt

Please excuse Tim for being. It was his father's fault