ME AND MY MATES

 

Me and my mates

Are in a band

Called Duvet,

We’re a cover band

GIRLS IF HE CAN’T APPRECIATE

 

Girls, if he can’t appreciate

Your funny humorous show

And all of your fruit jokes

Then you need to let mango

DON’T EAT ANYTHING, FATTY

 

My doctor said to me

Don’t eat anything fatty

What he meant by that was

Don’t eat anything, fatty

VERTICALLY CHALLENGED FOLKS

 

You’ve really got to

Hand it to the short folks

That’s because they can’t

Reach it themselves

BUTT CHEEKS

 

Is “Buttcheeks”

One word?

Or should I spread

Them apart

CULLINARY PUBLICATIONS

 

I once ate a dictionary

And it was really bad

It gave me thesaurus throat

I’ve ever had

MY FRIENDS LAUGHED AT ME

 

My friends laughed at me

When I said I had a girlfriend,

Which was a rotten thing to do

And they said she was imaginary

Well, the last laugh is on them

Because they’re imaginary too