The tradition of kissing Friday
Was called Nippy Hug
Day
When Leicestershire
men
Could demand on that
day
A kiss from any woman
Of his choice by
custom
And if she was to
refuse
He could then pinch
her bum
But since world war
two
Kissing Friday doesn’t
apply
It has fallen from
favour
I can’t understand why
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
When he got a
telephone call
“Hump Me Dumpty” Bo
said
And he fainted and
fell off the wall
Are you wearing worn out drawers?
Well, I think it’s
something certain
You may put on a very
good show
But your riches have
gone for a burton
And despite every
outwardly sign
It’s a case of “all
kippers and curtains”
It wasn’t a pea in her bed that kept her awake
It was something of a
very different genus
The reason for her
exhaustion each morning
Was as a result of the
Princess and a penis
I went into hospital for minor surgery
And the surgeons were
a couple of arses
One of them said to
the other “I bet now
You wish you hadn't
forgotten your glasses.”
Jean Pierre coated his French Letters
In the famous orange
liqueur digestive
His girlfriend liked
flavoured condoms
He called them his
Cointreau-ceptives
The chicken and the egg
Lay in the afterglow
He lit a cigarette and
said
“Well now we know”
