THERE WERE NO EGGS

There were no eggs

At all today at Lidl’s

As all the hens now

Identify as cockerels

THE OLD CHICKEN STOPPED LAYING EGGS

 

The old chicken stopped laying eggs

And when investigating the cause

The local vet soon discovered that she

Was going through the henopause

FOGHORN LEGHORN WORKS OUT

Foghorn Leghorn works out

And gives his muscles a flex

As he keeps himself in shape

And concentrates on his pecks 

PRISSY LEGHORN CROSSED THE ROAD

 

Prissy Leghorn crossed the road

Without any fuss or theatrics 

Because her husband Foghorn

Said there was a man laying bricks

DAPHNE DUCK MARRIED

 

Daphne Duck married

Foghorn Leghorn

And their child woke them

At the quack of dawn

WHY DID THE CHICKEN GO TO THE SÉANCE?

 

Why did the chicken go to the séance?

Rather than stay where he resides

The reason he went to the séance

Was so he could reach the other side

IN A SHELL SUIT

 

What do you call a chicken?

The question begs

If it wears a shell suit?

It’s obviously an Egg

ONE DAY IN THE FUTURE THE TIME WILL COME

 

One day in the future the time will come

When tolerance and acceptance will reign

And chickens will be free to cross the road

Without their motives being questioned again

THE HALF A CHICKEN CROSSED THE ROAD

 

The half a chicken crossed the road

Because he had no one beside

So, the reason it crossed the road

Was to get to its other side

WHEN THE HEADLESS CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD

 

When the headless chicken crossed the road

There was no wing under which to tuck it

Because sadly the chicken crossed the road

In a mega sized, southern fried, family bucket

WHY DID THE CHEWING GUM CROSS THE HIGHWAY?

 

Why did the chewing gum cross the highway?

Isn’t a question you get asked every day

However, the answer is actually a simple one 

Because it was stuck to a chicken's bum

WHAT DO YOU CALL A ROOSTER WHO WAKES

 

What do you call a rooster who wakes

You up every morning at five o’clock

His actual name is Foghorn Leghorn

But we like to call him the alarm cock

WHY DID THE CHICKEN NOT CROSS THE ROAD

 

Why did the chicken not cross the road

And choose instead to commit suicide?

It seems to me to be the wrong approach

If he just wanted to get to the other side

THE CHICKEN AND THE EGG LAY

 

The chicken and the egg

Lay in the afterglow

He lit a cigarette and said

“Well now we know”

POULTRY FARMERS WHO KEEP

 

Poultry farmers who keep

Battery chickens are fiends 

Because they earn their

Immoral living by fowl means

A CHICKEN AT THE MOVIES

 

A chicken at the movies

Made the whole theatre look

So, the manager asked

“Why are you here chook?”

The chicken replied,

“Well, because I liked the book”

FOGHORN LEGHORN LE ROOSTER

 

Foghorn Leghorn Le Rooster

Crossed a busy Parisian Rue

Because he had something

Important to cockadoodle dooo

REVEREND FOGHORN LEGHORN

 

Reverend Foghorn Leghorn

Has done his reputation damage

When he was ejected from church

For using fowl language

FOGHORN LEGHORN’S WIFE ONLY LAID

 

Foghorn Leghorn’s wife only laid

Her eggs in the winter or fall

But that made sense, as she was

No Spring Chicken after all

ONE DAY IN A FAR MORE CARING WORLD

 

One day in a far more caring world

Every chicken that ever lives

Will be able to cross the road without

Being judged on their motives