ARE YOU WEARING A PETTICOAT?

 

Are you wearing a petticoat?

Are they were still in vogue?

That’s delightful apparel

For a lascivious old rogue

THE PLURAL OF MOUSE

 

So, if it is correct that

The plural of mouse is mice

Then why is the plural of house

Houses and not hice

IF CLERGYMEN CAN BE DEFROCKED # 2

 

If clergymen can be defrocked

Then can dry cleaners get de-pressed

Or must songwriters be de-composed

And hair stylists get dis-tressed?

IF LAWYERS CAN BE DISBARRED # 1

 

If Lawyers can be disbarred

then will fishermen be debated?

Will magicians be disillusioned?

And politicians denominated?

WHEN THE PRINCESS FOUND THE FROG

 

When the princess found the frog

And the kiss was firmly planted

The prince turned out to be gay

And the Princess was disenchanted

PUT DOWN # 58

 

Put downs work the best

For deflecting unwanted attention

But try to be amusing

As this relieves the tension

If he falters and flirts with you

He is only flattering to deceive

So, ignore him, but if he persists ask

“If I throw a stick, will you leave?”

BIMBETTE IS NOT THE BRIGHTEST

 

Bimbette is not the brightest

And living with her is very hard

In fact, she’s the reason

The gene pool needs a lifeguard