ARE YOU WEARING A SCARY SCOWL?

 

Are you wearing a scary scowl?

And now you’re doing the growl

Am I supposed to throw in the towel?

 

You evil troll you cause me no fear

Back to your bridge do you hear

Your powers are useless here

ARE YOU WEARING A GHOULISH JUMPER?

 

Are you wearing a ghoulish Jumper?

Well, its contents are rather bumper

I don’t think you’re one of those kooks

And that’s a lovely pair of spooks

A CHEESY TALE

 

My love life is like

A wheel of Swiss cheese I think

It’s full of holes

And the remainder tends to stink

AN AFFAIR OF THE HEART

 

An affair of the heart

And at my age too

Well yes, I know it’s

A bypass that’s true

IT’S A SURE SIGN YOU HAVE LOST # 1

 

It’s a sure sign you have lost

Your sex appeal for certain

When the local peeping tom

Chooses to close your curtain

ARE YOU ADDICTED TO PLASTIC SURGERY?

 

Are you addicted to plastic surgery?

Or just had more than your fair share

Well, it’s a sure sign when your surgeon

Is an employee of Tupperware

AS THEY STOOD BEFORE THE ALTAR

 

As they stood before the altar

At the proudest moment of their life

The Reverend said “I now pronounce

You Husband and Wife”

“You may now update your Facebook status”