OUR SCARECROW WON FIRST PRIZE

 

Our scarecrow won first prize

When the winner was revealed

The judges at the county show

Thought it outstanding in its field

THE CARPENTERS

  

My wife said to me

Let’s play carpenter’s

So, we got hammered

Then I nailed her

BLOOD MAY WELL BE THICKER THAN WATER

 

Blood may well be thicker than water

But to a son or daughter

When it comes to Parenthood

This should be understood

There’s more to it you see

What makes a parent is proximity

PRIOR TO 1066

 

Prior to 1066

Before he became a conqueror

William of Normandy

Was just known as William the.

MY WIFE WANTED THE HEATING ON

 

My wife wanted the heating on in september

But I didn’t want it on until at least october

In our house its known simply as cold war-fare

I AM A FORTIFIED WINE CONNOISSEUR

 

I am a connoisseur

Of all types of wine

Albeit self taught

And have a Radio channel

About fortified wines

It’s called, Talks Port

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 164

 

 

There was an old woman of Leeds
Who spent all her time in good deeds;
until she moved to Lancashire