EINSTEIN A GO-GO # 1

 

The theory of relativity

Or so I always thought

Meant if you go with a cousin

Don’t get caught

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 110

 

Young lambs to sell, young lambs to sell

If I won the lottery how I would yell

If I won so much money that I couldn’t tell

That I could taste and touch and smell

I would never have to cry, "Young lambs to sell"

ARE YOU WEARING SEXY GARTERS?

 

Are you wearing sexy garters?

Answer me that one for starters

Beneath your dress up high

Around your black clad thigh

Where the black sheath is stopping

Where they are lacy at the topping

Are there lacy garter rings

Sexily placed decorative things

Please answer this one for starters

Are you wearing lacy garters?

DOCTOR PHOBIA

 

I went to see my GP. And I said

“I'm scared of lapels Doctor”

He said “ok just calm down

You've a touch of cholera”

SINCE THE BBC SACKED ALL THE DALEKS # 1

 

Since the BBC sacked all the Daleks

Most are just scrounging off the state

But there is one working at our salon

He doesn’t really communicate

And it scares a lot of the customers

When it says “Exfoliate, exfoliate”

JANE AND I

 

“I’ve been to Wales with Jane”

I was told by my friend

“Then tomorrow Jane and I

Are going to Lands End”

“And I will probably take Jane

To London at the weekend”

I didn’t like to shatter his illusions

But I had to in the end

“Jane is the voice on your SatNav

She’s not a proper girlfriend”

IF PASTA AND ANTI PASTA

 

If pasta and anti pasta

Came together

On one platter

Would it lead to disaster?