I don’t have a favourite;
I love each and every one
Whether happy or sad
Cheerful or glum
I love tarty Marti
And svelter Delta
Sloppy Poppy
And vulgar Olga
I love baddy Maddie
And angrier Andrea
Clean Jean
And fairer Farah
I love scorer Pandora
And messy Bessie
Gaudy Maudie
And sassie Cassie
I love a damp vamp
To tell the truth
Or Horny Dawny
And uncouth Ruth
How do you make a fruit desert?
It’s not rocket
science to be curt
If you want your
partner to scram
Just have sex with
another man
If you have sex with a prostitute
And leave without
paying
Is there a specific
law in statute?
Or is it just like
shoplifting
I had just ordered my dream car
The Porsche I’ve
always wanted to own
So, I contacted all my
friends
By text on my mobile
phone
“Can’t wait for the
new 911”
As simple as that,
just the job
An hour later the door
was kicked in
By the anti-terrorist
squad
Being a Christian man,
Of high moral standing
I was not prepared
For the resulting
misunderstanding
It was on my arrival
At the hotel reception
After the pleasantries
And before completing
registration
I merely asked the
receptionist
If she was at all able
To make sure the porn
channel
In my room was
disabled
To which she replied
With the tone of utter scorn
“No, you sick bastard.
Blow, blow thou inner wind -
Thou art so unkind
As man's flatulence
Thy toot is not so keen,
Because thou art not
seen,
Although thy breath be
rude
