WHATS IN A NAME (22)

 

Does anyone know if Ralph Coates?

Does anyone know if Brenda Totes?

Does anyone think is Donna Tart?

Would you know is Maxwell Smart?

A FURTHER DEFENCE OF A PIANO

 

I did say it was insecurity

Perhaps it should have been immaturity

“Shall we compare dicks?”

I haven’t done that since I was six

Posting twice was not my intent

And a repeat of this I’ll try to prevent

I didn’t think the poem was a bad one

I liked it well enough when it was done

If you don’t like it that’s alright

No need to bitch and moan or start a fight

I write for my amusement

Not to provoke an argument 

BUDGET

 

They take you here

They take you there

To do it cheap

Just fly Chav air

NATURE OR NURTURE

 

Was it Nature?

Or is it nurture

I was bought up on an estate

And I turned out all right at any rate

But my estate was not council run

And covered half the shire of Huntingdon

DEATH BY CRABS

 

People would say

“You look well”

People I hadn’t seen for months

Especially

And I admit

I did feel well

But inside I was being consumed

From the inside out

By an unseen evil

Krebs

The Germans call it

Which translates to crabs

In English it sounds so innocuous

Death by crabs

It claimed my father

His mother and grandmother

But crabs can’t kill, can they?

No, but cancer can

The sign of the crab

BLOWN AWAY

 

Women differ in many ways

From an inflatable counterpart

Inflatables don’t answer back

Or take an age to get ready for a start

 

But the thing they have in common

Which will make you frown

Neither of them are any fun at all

When you’ve let them down

OH GOODY

My wish is to get my poems published

And not because I want to be paid

And I will just have to persevere

Until I manage to make the grade

I will give up trying however, if I see

A book of verse written by Jade