I BECAME VERY FRUSTRATED TODAY

 

I became very frustrated today

When repeatedly told to press any key

Because on my computer keyboard

I can confirm there is no “any” key

BROWSING SENIOR

 

You know you are old when

You greet, with absolute delight

The statutory offer for you

To accept cookies on a new website

5G

 

There are no limits to technology

And advances are anticipated with 5G

Enhancing forms of communication

Imparting important information

Using varied multimedia interfacing

Video clips and picture messaging

But there is a downside or failure

Primarily photos of user’s genitalia

I TOOK MY WIFE TO AN APPLE ORCHARD

 

I took my wife to an Apple Orchard

And the fruit hung ripe to adore

But she didn’t like it, as it was not

The Apple Watch she was hoping for

I PLUGGED MY ELECTRIC BLANKET INTO THE TOASTER

 

I plugged my electric blanket into the toaster

Not deliberately, I knew that wouldn’t be right

It really happened by mistake, but it happened

And as a result I kept popping out of bed all night

POSSESSED BUNDLE

 

My TV programmer is on the blink

The things possessed I'm in no doubt

It records the programs I don't like

And plays them back when I go out

MY SON ASKED WHY I SPOKE SO QUIETLY

 

My son asked why I spoke so quietly

While at home and I responded brightly

That China were listening, and he laughed,

So, I laughed, and then our devices laughed

MY REMOTE CONTROL STOPPED WORKING

 

My remote control stopped working

And wouldn’t operate the TV

It turned out that the batteries were dead

It was nothing short of AA calamity

MY COMPUTER IS FREEZING

 

My computer was always cold

In fact I thought it was broken

But our IT guy just told me

It was coz I left Windows open

MY DAD IS JUST LIKE A LAPTOP

 

My dad is just like a laptop,

If you interact with him and stop

And for ten minutes don’t make a peep

He will always go to sleep

I HAVE TAKEN PRIDE IN UNUSUAL QUARTERS

 

I have taken pride in unusual quarters

And I speak knowing that pride is wrong

One proud moments, was when a website

Told me my password was “Very Strong.”

FRIENDSHIP IS DIFFICULT TO DEFINE

 

Friendship is difficult to define

But I think the best example for me

Is when I walk into someone’s house

And Wi-Fi connects automatically

THE TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE IS FANTASTIC # 1

 

The technology available is fantastic

But is it more trouble than it’s worth

And will our worst fears be realised

And shall the geek inherit the earth

I RESISTED GETTING A MOBILE PHONE

I resisted getting a mobile phone for a long time

But I gave in and was told I’d never regret it

Now if I leave home without the thing, I panic

And I have to turn around to go back and get it

THE TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE IS FANTASTIC # 2

 

The technology available is fantastic

But it has affected me detrimentally

As I realized I’ve not played solitaire

With a real deck of cards this century

I AM DEEPLY IN LOVE AND JOYOUSLY HAPPY

 

I am deeply in love and joyously happy

In our rewarding, loving Relationship

In fact I am walking on air in my joy

And get a natural high from our elationship

ONE DAY A COMPUTER

 

One day a computer

Actually, beat me at chess,

I didn’t take it well,

I was a total mess

So, we had a rematch

To go tit for tat

But he was no match for me

With a baseball bat

I NEED YOU TO DELETE ME FROM YOUR ADDRESS BOOK

 

“I need you to delete me from your address book”

My ex-girlfriend emailed me to express

I pondered for some time before I replied

“Who is this? And how did you get this address?”

ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE IS BEING EXPLORED

 

Artificial Intelligence is being explored

By science, despite its inadvisability

But then education and inquisitiveness

Are no defence against natural stupidity

THE TECHNOLOGICAL AGE

 

The technological age of the

21st century is great, isn't it?

When deleting history has become

More important than making it.