I told my mum
That
I made a car
Out
of Spaghetti
It
wasn’t until
I
drove pasta
That
she believed me
Sunday, 16 February 2025
SPAGETTI MOTHER
THE COUPLE WERE KISSING ON THE COUCH
The couple were kissing on the couch
“Shall we take it
upstairs?” he said,
“That’s a great
idea babe” she replied
“Grab the other
end of it then” he pled
MY WIFE IS INCREDIBLY SMART, BECAUSE
My wife is incredibly smart, because
I rang her on the
phone of a buddy
And she answered
“Hello darling”
Amazingly she
already knew it was me
A PESSIMIST CAN ONLY SEE
A pessimist can only see
A long dark tunnel
An optimist sees
light
At the end of the
tunnel
A realist sees a
freight train
Coming down the
tracks
The train driver
sees
Three idiots
standing on the tracks
I TRAPPED A COUPLE OF VEGAN BURGLARS
I trapped a couple of Vegan burglars
In my basement to
my total disbelief
At least I assumed
they were Vegan
Because they keep
shouting “Lettuce leaf”
AS I GET OLDER I SIT DOWN AND REMEMBER
As I get older I sit down and remember
All the people
I’ve lost along the way
I think maybe a
career as a tour guide
Isn’t right for me
at the end of the day
I ALWAYS KNOCK ON THE FRIDGE
I always knock on the fridge
Before I open it,
no messing
Just in case when
I look inside
I find there’s a
salad dressing
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