WE CAN MAKE LOVE

 

“We can make love” she said

Suggestively more and more

But I ignored her and put vole

On a triple word score

I WAS HANGING OUT BY THE POOL

 

I was hanging out by the pool

When I was on holiday in Spain

But someone kindly let me know

So, I tucked it back in again

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 340

 

Eeper Weeper, Chimney sweeper,

Had a skinny wife but couldn’t keep her.

That’s because

He didn't love her,

And up the chimney he did shove her

WINKS IS AN ACRONYM

 

WINKS is an acronym for

"Women with Incomes and

No Kids" plenty of money

But no ring on their hand

WHINGING BRITS ABROAD # 6

 

“No hairdressers at the resort”

The sign said at the resort 

My wife is a hairdresser

And she was totally distraught

ARE YOU WEARING BLACK NAIL VARNISH?

 

Are you wearing black nail varnish?

Well, it’s just a bit of a macabre garnish

And it’s going to stand out is all I will say

When dressed in white on your wedding day

THEY’VE STARTED A BREEDING PROGRAM

 

They’ve started a breeding program

At our local petting zoo

But visitors are worried it will

Become a heavy petting zoo