WHEN MY LITTLE DOG’S SETTLE DOWN

 

When my little dog’s settle down

On Christmas Eve amidst the snores

The little doggies dream like a child

And they dream about Santa Paws

THE LATEST GOSSIP IS IN FROM THE NORTH POLE

 

The latest gossip is in from the North Pole

And the Claus’s have divorced you know

So why did Santa divorce Mrs. Claus?

Because he found out she was a ho ho ho

SCROOGE HATES CHRISTMAS

 

Scrooge hates Christmas

But loves all of the reindeer

And the simple reason for that is

To him every buck is dear

SUPERMARKET BLUES # 2

 

You know it really gets me down

As you wait patiently in the queue

Waiting in line at the supermarket

And the line of People behind you

When as another checkout opens up

They suddenly dash ahead of you

To the newly opened checkout

And you’re at the back of your queue

And all those impatient shoppers

Get served and finished before you

LIFE’S VEXATIONS # 1

 

Is there anything more annoying?

Is anything quite as wrong?

As the DJ on the radio

Not telling you who sang the song

FOGHORN LEGHORN HAD A GIRLFRIEND

 

Foghorn Leghorn had a girlfriend

And her name was feathery Beth

But her feathers all pointed the wrong way

And she tickled herself to death

YOU CAN LIKEN WOMEN’S BREASTS

 

You can liken women’s breasts to a

Birthday gift of a train set, for lads

They were originally meant for kids

But who gets to play with them, Dads