Monday, 17 October 2022

GEORGE WASHINGTON CHOPPED DOWN

 

George Washington chopped down

His father's favourite cherry tree,

Then George admitted doing it

He was rewarded for his honesty

When his father didn't punish him

Well, those are the accepted facts

But I think we should consider

That George was still holding the ax

THE GENERAL CONSENSUS

 

The general consensus

Is that it is inappropriate

To spank a child, and rightly so

Therefore, with my own children

And grandchildren for that matter

I adopted a different tack

Whenever one of the little darlings

Goes into “meltdown”

I take the unhappy child

For a ride in the car

Where I find it possible to talk to them

Some say it's the cars vibration

Or the rhythm of the vehicle

Or maybe it’s just escaping

The modern-day gadgets

Whatever it is I always find

A twenty-minute car ride

With them tied to the roof rack

Always does the trick

OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO STRONG

 

Our friendship is so strong

It will never come apart,

Because the bonds of friendship

Come straight from the heart 

POETRY CAN BE VERY ROMANTIC

 

Poetry can be very romantic

But it doesn’t work for all

And it doesn’t really count if

You write it on a toilet wall

IF YOUR BLIND DATE IS DESCRIBED TO YOU # 1

 

If your blind date is described to you

As “Thoughtful” it’s not the best start

As their thoughtfulness will only extend

To saying "Excuse me" when they fart

Sunday, 16 October 2022

THE ONLY CUTTING EDGE THAT

 

The only cutting edge that

Gets sharper through life

The more it’s been used

Is the tongue of my wife

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 263

 

Tommy Snooks and Bessie Brooks

Were walking out one Sunday;

Tommy Snooks and Bessie Brooks

Walked to the woods this one day

And Tommy Snooks to Bessie Brooks,

Had something of a fun day