HAPPINESS TRANSACTION

Money can't buy you happiness

Isn’t that supposed to be the deal?

Well, I beg to differ, because

I bought myself a Happy Meal

MY NEW NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOUR

 

My new next-door neighbour,

It turns out, is a really pretentious twat

He has travelled quite a lot

So, his house is named Bindair Dundat.

SHE THOUGHT I WAS THE ONE

 

When I married my wife

She thought I was the one

Now she thinks, on a scale

Of one to ten, I am a one

I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH HEDGEHOGS

 

I have a problem with Hedgehogs

I know it’s a strange thing to allege

I just find it hard to understand

Why can’t they just share the hedge?

THE VET SAID

 

The vet said “Your Pekinese will keep vomiting,

But it’s your choice

To continue to keep talking to the creature

In that stupid gooey voice”

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 255

 

The Easter Bunny's feet

Go hop, hop, hop.

I want to eat the bunny

I can’t stop, stop, stop.

So, I chase him with an axe

Going chop, chop, chop.

ARE YOU WEARING A GRIN?

 

Are you wearing a grin?

Oh, you’re playing stupid agin

And why not you do always win