21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 201

 

Three little kitties

They lost their skimpies,

And they began to cry,

"Oh mother dear,

We sadly fear

That we have lost our skimpies."

"What! Lost your skimpies,

You silly kitties!

That’s the third time this month

ARE YOU WEARING SOCKS?

 

Are you wearing socks?

Tell me that you are, pray

Why must you adopt

The most bohemian way

And be quite sock less

On your wedding day

RED LEATHER CHAIR

 

My earliest memory

Of Grandpa Henry

Is of him sat in his chair,

A red leather affair,

Reading a volume

Of prose in his room

He sat me on his knee

And then he read to me

And for an age, we pair

Sat in his red leather chair

Reading tales of daring

And in adventures sharing

I WAS ONCE A MEDICAL STUDENT # 5

 

I was once a medical student

But I didn’t really try

I was asked what “varicose” meant

And said it was nearby

I DON’T HAVE A SATNAV

 

I don’t have a Satnav

I don’t need one in my life

l have something better

My Satnav is my wife

A NEW MUMMY HAS BEEN DISCOVERED

 

A new mummy has been discovered

In Egypt by an Italian Professor

It was covered in chocolate and nuts

And is believed to be Pharaoh Rocher

TO THOSE WHO LOOTED

 

To those who looted electrical goods during rioting,

A Police press conference announced today

Should be aware of the consequences so remember this

The one year manufacturer's warranty runs out in May