I went out with a Debbie once
But most men of my generation
Have been out with a
Debbie
It was hard to avoid
any association
It was because of
Debbie Reynolds
The actress from
America
She was in “Singing in
the Rain”
You know, Carrie
Fishers Mother
They were hard to
avoid anyway
They came in all shapes
and sizes
Some were full of port
and lemon
Some were full of
surprises
But don’t think the
name made
Debbie’s different to
any other
I’m just bitter
because my Debbie
Went off with my
brother
Pringles are all uniform
The same weight shape
and size
Pringles are never any
different
They never ever
surprise
The Pringles stack in
a tube
They fit in ever so
neatly
They were obviously
designed
For those with OCD
I don’t have a foot fetish
I am not particularly
into feet
But Belinda’s were
perfection
Exquisitely small and
neat
I’ve always thought
feet ugly
I know mine are of
that kind
But her perfect
painted toes
Made me change my mind
Insects are dangerous
I thought you should
know
Some kill you quick
Some kill you slow
Some poison the blood
In your arteries
Yes, I’m talking about
The hepatitis bee
She had blocked the corridor
And I had blocked her
passage
And an impasse had
been reached
Which was not so easy
to assuage
Eventually compromise
reigned
And ground was conceded
equally
And accommodations
were reached
A curt embrace
followed, continentally
This led surprisingly
to kissing
Then there was
cuddling and huggage
And passions burned brightly
And we made love amongst
the luggage
Jack ate all the lean,
Joan ate all the fat.
They left the platter so clean,
There was nothing for the cat
The NHS has plans to save money
But they plan’s maybe
hard to pass
The Proctologists have
responded
By telling them to
stick them up their arse
