MARATHON MAN

I used to be a Marathon man

A Marathon man was I

Then they renamed them Snickers

I don’t know why

NHS CUT BACKS # 2

 

The NHS has plans to save money

And there has been opposition all right

But the Gastroenterologists

Don’t have the stomach for a fight

EXERCISE REGIME WEEK 1

 

You must have an exercise regime

My doctor advised me

But he said it is essential

To build it up very gradually

So, for the first week

I am watching sport on TV

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 63

 

Rain, rain go away,

You’re ruining my holiday

I wait all year to come away

Rain, rain, go to Spain,

Don’t come back to Wales again

SEXUAL PREFERENCES # 11

 

I don’t have a favourite;

I love each and every one

Whether happy or sad

Cheerful or glum

 

I love tarty Marti

And svelter Delta

Sloppy Poppy

And vulgar Olga

 

I love baddy Maddie

And angrier Andrea

Clean Jean

And fairer Farah

 

I love scorer Pandora

And messy Bessie

Gaudy Maudie

And sassie Cassie

 

I love a damp vamp

To tell the truth

Or Horny Dawny

And uncouth Ruth

HOW DO YOU MAKE A FRUIT DESERT?

 

How do you make a fruit desert?

It’s not rocket science to be curt

If you want your partner to scram

Just have sex with another man

RETIRED?

 

I was tired yesterday

And I’m tired again today

That makes me re-tired I’d say