I'LL TAKE THE RED ONE

 

Bimbette asked in a sex shop

“I want to buy a new vibrator”

The assistant said “just choose

From that display by the door

"I'll take the red one" She said

To the man behind the counter

He replied with a deep sigh

"That's a fire extinguisher"

I'VE JUST HAD A LETTER FROM A SOLICITOR

I've just had a letter from a solicitor

To “once and for all” inform me

That contrary to what I might believe

Screwfix are not a dating agency

I'VE JUST HEARD THE WINDOW CLEANER

I've just heard the window cleaner

He was really making tongues wag

Cursing, shouting and swearing

I think he’d clearly lost his rag

TAKING THE CHERRY

 

The Cherry Ripe bar

I have so far concluded

As one of your five a day

May definitely be included

HARE OF THE DOG

 

I need a bit of a pick me up

After a very boozy lunch

A “hare of the dog” is the thing

After too much Rabbit Punch

ALL-TIME CLASSIC MOVIE FAVOURITES – EACH DAWN I DIE (1939)

“Each Dawn I Die” is a Crime Drama, screenplay by Norman Reilly and Raine Warren Duff, from a Novel by Jerome Odlum and Directed by William Keighley.

In this prison classic, a top-notch newspaper reporter Frank Ross (James Cagney) angers a corrupt District Attorney with political ambitions, and with Ross’s news stories implicating him in criminal activity he decides to frame Ross for manslaughter in order to silence him.

Although innocent, he is found guilty and is sent to jail but while his friends at the newspaper try to find out who framed him, Frank gets hardened by prison life and his optimism turns to bitterness and then he meets fellow-

SCOTT OF THE ANTARCTIC

About Captain Scott

There are revelations

Concerning his

Sexual orientations

Because of rumours

About his sexual habits

He will hence be

Scott of the arse antics