ALL AT SEA

 

It was last summer when

Uncle John and Aunty May

Left Southampton

On a cruise ship holiday

 

I wouldn’t like it

It was like a holiday camp at sea

And just like Butlin's

There was entertainment daily

 

And after dinner

At the end of each day

Everyone met in the lounge

Where there were games to play

 

But one evening

Illness struck aunty May

So Uncle Joe

Went on his own to play

 

Each person had to give

A ten minute address that evening

On a subject

Of someone else’s choosing

 

When Joe’s turn came

Of all the subjects

That he could have had

He had to talk about sex

 

He was very nervous

But gave of his all

And at the end Applause

Reverberated round the hall

 

Feeling very pleased

Joe went back to his cabin

And found May still awake

Who wanted updating

 

“We had to give a little talk

It was a very nice evening  

Ten minutes on a subject

Of someone else’s choosing”

 

“What was your speech about?”

May wanted to hear

He thought for a moment

And said “It was about sailing dear”

 

The next day on deck

To May’s surprise

The other passengers

Greeted her with excited cries

 

“Oh your husbands speech

Was just wonderful

He was very enthusiastic

And very knowledgeable”

 

“Well I am quite surprised

To here that of Joe

As he’s only done it twice

As far as I know”

 

“The first time he was sick”

She said with a scoff

“And the second time

His hat flew off”.