THERE’S A GREAT VOLUME I’M READING

 

There’s a great volume I’m reading

About Japanese Sword-Fighting,

It’s quite a detailed manuscript

Would you like me to samuraise it?

THERE IS A NEW UNIT OF MEASUREMENT

 

There is a new unit of measurement

And I promise it’s not flimflam

For calculating the weight of a hipster

The base unit is an Instagram

SHE WAS SITTING AT THE DINING TABLE

 

She was sitting at the dining table

And I was suspiciously watching

As she had a pen and graph paper

So, she was plotting something

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 424

 

Oranges and Lemons

Say the bells of St. Clement's?

No, they really don’t

You are delusional

ARE YOU WEARING CAPRI PANTS?

 

Are you wearing Capri Pants?

You’d look at home on a yacht

But I can say one thing for sure

Audrey Hepburn you are not

THERE IS GREAT HUMOUR TO BE FOUND # 2

 

There is great humour to be found

Among the Brits in their abundance

But for me the funniest of them all

Have got to be those from Punzance

ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN # 10

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern

Contrary to the rumour did not peg it

After they stole the theatre takings

They were recognised and had to leg it