ARE YOU WEARING DUNGAREES?

 

Are you wearing dungarees?

I think they are really nice

You should wear them more often

That would be my advice

Because I can strip you down

To your Knicks in a trice

ARE YOU WEARING HALLOWEEN EARRINGS?

 

Are you wearing Halloween earrings?

They rather fill me with dread?

Please answer me one question

Are they real shrunken heads?

SINCE YOU WALKED OUT ON ME

 

Since you walked out on me

As an act of defiance

Each morning I sit and eat

Breakfast in my pants

But I have discovered

Its little consolation

And I actually miss

Your personal hygiene rants

I MISS YOU ALL THE TIME

 

I miss you all the time

You were my shining sun

And there is an emptiness

But when all said and done

There’s nothing lonelier

Than dinner for one

DOLPHINS SUFFER FROM ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION

 

Dolphins suffer from Erectile Dysfunction

And their sex life has come a cropper

Not much is known about their condition

But they’ve gone from Flipper to Flopper

SNAGS IS AN ACRONYM

 

SNAGS is an acronym

For “Sensitive New Age Guy’s”

But don’t all men come with snags?

Just like turds come with flies 

I REMEMBER WELL THAT FATEFUL DAY

 

I remember well that fateful day

When I read of the evils of drinking

And so shocked was I that I decided

On that very spot to give up reading