ARE YOU WEARING A BEARD?

 

Are you wearing a beard?

Wow that’s really weird

With the way you walk

And on the phone when we talk

Well, that has me in a whirl

I thought you were a girl

I’M THINKING ABOUT TAKING A HOLIDAY # 4

 

I’m thinking about taking a holiday

But I don’t know where to go

I have never been in Flexible

But I really don’t know

I think it’s important to stand firm

So I would have to say no

THE RED HOUSE

 

I met her in the Red House

When she gave me the eye

I gave her an appraising look

And thought I’d give her a try

I knew my luck was in when

She was unbuttoning my fly

ANNA WAS A GOOD TIME GIRL

 

Anna was a good time girl

In fact she really had a ball

And we called her Anna Glypta

As she liked it up against the wall

MY DOG MUST BE MUSICAL

 

My dog must be musical

What rubbish I hear you groan

But he must be I tell you

As I saw him eating a trombone

SOMEWHERE UNPRONOUNCEABLE # 1

I went on holiday to somewhere unpronounceable

Who have a novel approach to automation

You are not prohibited to own a motor car

Unless it is Red, making them a Red Car-nation

I WAS STOOD AT THE BAR LAST NIGHT

 

I was stood at the bar last night

When a vampire gave me a fright

As I fully expected him to take a bite

But instead he ordered a blood light