BRAINIAC

God gave men larger brains

Than cats and doggies

So they won't hump women's legs

At cocktails parties

OH HON

When.your wife says, 

"Let’s go upstairs and make love, hon."

You know that you are old

When you can do only one 

CROCODILE ROCK

You know you’re getting old

When friends that you greet

Admire your new alligator shoes

And you have nothing on your feet 

CHANGING MODE

Fed up with blonde jokes

Bimbette and Peachy, her chum

Decided to dye their hair

They are now both platinum

BREAST STROKE MODE

When Bimbette the model Was still at school

She lost in a race in the swimming pool

It was the breast stroke race she came last in

Because her competitors used their arms to swim 

A QUESTION OF BALANCE

 

My father in law is a pain in the ass

I hope I’m not like him when I’m older

My brother in law is just as bad

A little more cocky and certainly bolder

But they’re very balanced individuals

They have a chip on each shoulder

Uncanny Tales – (55) Just Enough

 

Sylvia leant forward, bending at the waist, just enough to tighten the fabric of her jeans, shaping and defining her sculptured buttocks to pert perfection, and just enough to stir his ardour.
She leant a little further, just enough to expose some smooth unblemished dusky flesh, and showing above the waistband, the merest glimpse of pale pink panties with white lace trim
showing seductively against her dusky skin. 
Sylvia then straightened up and turned towards him glancing in his direction knowing he was watching, knowing his libidinous thoughts and the effect she was having on him.
So she leant forward again, bending at the waist, just enough to fill her gaping blouse with well-rounded beauty, her breasts sitting in pert perfection, round and full, encased in pink cups with white lace trim showing seductively against her dusky skin, and beyond the lace a hint of nipple, a glimpse of areola, just enough through the tight well filled fabric, deliciously defined in pink, just enough to further arouse.
Then Sylvia straightened up looking towards him, smiling in his direction knowing he was watching, knowing his libidinous thoughts and knowing the effect she was having on him and Sylvia was liking it.