She was a very big lass
And
Apple shaped I suppose
But
she was dressed
In
quite unsuitable clothes
Beige
Lycra pedal pushers
And
a long white clingy top
They
would have looked better
Left
hanging in the shop
It
certainly was a sight
I
wouldn’t easily forget
As
I watched her in the sun
Looking
like a melting cornet
The Lighthouse, with
Lantern burning bright
Stands sentinel
A beacon in the night
Steadfastly gazing out
Its piercing light
Cutting through the dark
Warning those at sea
In peril or plight
And providing all
With its piercing light
In the darkest hour
A comforting sight
When my girlfriend suggested
We play Doctors and Nurses
I was up for it even when
She told me about the role reverses
But when I dressed up in a uniform
With a starched white apron
She buggered off to play
Eighteen holes with a surgeon
Are you wearing a onesie?
I didn’t know you were the type
But you have surprised me
And yes, I like the tiger stripe
Well yes, I don’t mind if I do
It’s very soft to the touch
Yes, I’d like to feel inside
Thank you so very much
My cat is a fussy eater
That’s not uncommon for a Siamese
And for breakfast she will only eat
A bowl of Mice Crispies
As Jiminy Cricket famously said
“Let conscience be your guide”
It’s a simple enough philosophy
Listen to the voice of reason
Keep compassion in your heart
And integrity at your core
And you won’t go far wrong
It’s really great not being a foreigner
As
I don’t have to ask myself whether
The
man with a feather in his hat is a forester
A
customs man or a rural police officer
