COMPUTER SPOUSE

 

My husband is like

A computer unfortunately

He’s out of date

And hasn’t got enough memory

SOUNDS LIKE

 

What I think is quite ironic

Is that the word phonetic?

Why on consistency grounds?

Isn’t it spelt the way it sounds?

CLOSE SHAVE

 

Why is it when?

Two planes almost hit

It’s called a near miss?

That doesn’t fit

It should actually

Be called a near hit?

HAPPY AS A PIG

I don’t wish to appear a prig

But never wrestle with a pig

Don’t even do it for a bet

This you should not forget

You’ll both be covered in shit

And the pig really likes it

MANY A MICKLE

Life can be a struggle day by day

Scrimping and saving pennies away

By the time you can make ends meet

They move the ends just out of reach

CHARITY PLEADERS # 1

 

Just 3 pounds a month

Will help them meet their quota

So the fund raisers can drive

Their 30 grand motor

ALL OF HUMANKIND

All of humankind

Spread across the globe

Like a single organism

In bacterial proportions

And this human creature

This single entity

This living breathing

Multiplying mass thrives

And its heartbeat is love