LES GIRLS

 

I have wondered what it would be like

To be a lesbian or do they say dyke?

All the advantages of being a man

Getting off with girls when you can

And drooling over gorgeous gals

Without the embarrassing genitals

UP TO A SENIOR MOMENT

One of the problems with old age

And there are a few at this late stage

Apart from my weakened bladder

Is when I reach the top of the ladder

Which in itself is no mean feat at all

It’s leant against the wrong bloody wall

REALLY

 

Reality is that which,

A philosopher might say

When you stop believing in it,

Doesn’t go away

NEVER TOO SMALL

 

If they tell you you're too small

To have an impact, let’s assume

They’ve never tried going to bed

With a mosquito in the room

TO THE WOODS

 

Peach and Bimbette one day were walking in the woods

And found something on the ground where they stood

Peach bends down and says, “Look these are Bear marks”

Bimbette looked and disagreed with her friends remarks

“What are you on? They aren't bear marks you dummy”

'They're obviously deer prints” she says “Cant you see?”

It’s not clear how long they argued to be perfectly honest

Next day’s paper read: Two models hit by train in forest

A QUESTION OF MARRIAGE

 

Dad, I heard at school today,

That in the east, like in Bombay

A man doesn't know his wife

Until he marries her for life

That happens everywhere,

Son, absolutely everywhere

LOST IN A SPACE

 

I just got lost in thought

               I’m sorry but that’s my story

Now you might well scoff

               As it was unfamiliar territory