YOU KNOW YOU’VE HAD TOO MUCH TO DRINK WHEN

 

You know you’ve had too much to drink when

Your Job is interfering with your drinking. 

You lose arguments with inanimate objects

And the whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in.

You know you’ve had too much to drink when

When you stand up and fall down on your ass

Clare short starts to look very attractive

You only recognize your wife through the bottom of a glass.

You know you’ve had too much to drink when

That pink elephant followed you home again

Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you

You try to dance like Kelly in singing in the rain

 

You know you’ve had too much to drink when

"TORO TORO TORO!” you wake up and scream

At AA meetings you can’t remember your name

Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream

You know you’ve had too much to drink when

Your Basic diet is Caffeine, Alcohol and Nicotine

You can focus much better with one eye closed 

Clare Short is the most beautiful woman you’ve seen