WE’RE GETTING A NEW STADIUM

 

We’re getting a new stadium

Though it’s not my cup of tea

There is much to discuss

It’s a bit too tent like for me

And I’m not alone and it will

Leave many a fan nonplus

They are turning Old Trafford

From the Theatre of Dreams

To Billy Smarts Circus

DON’T JUDGE BY THE COVER

 

One said “it’s my Spine”

Another “it’s my appendix”

And finally, “I’m overdue”

But that’s all in a day’s work

Working at the Book Hospital

IT WAS PITIFUL TO WATCH MY SON

 

It was pitiful to watch my son sat staring at the book

While wearing a confused expression

So, I said “Just open the damn thing and read it,

It doesn’t need a password or decryption  

I’VE BEEN FEELING A LITTLE BIT MOODY

 

I’ve been feeling a little bit moody and

Run down lately, so I thought I should

Look up my symtoms and find the reason

It turns out I’m suffering from adulthood

WHILE SITTING AT HER HUSBAND’S FUNERAL

 

While sitting at her husband’s funeral

The widow was approached by a man

Asking, “Do you mind if I say a word?”

“No not at all” she replied “Go ahead”

So he walked briskly to the lectern

Cleared he throat and said “Plethora”

Then he walked back to the widow

“Thank you” she said “it means a lot”

AN ISLAMIC CLERIC BOLDLY CLAIMED

 

An Islamic Cleric boldly claimed

That the universe was undoubtedly

Created in the beginning by Allah

And said he had irrefutable proof

Because it began with an explosion

I HAD A VASECTOMY BECAUSE

 

I had a vasectomy because

I didn’t want kids to be fair

But when I got back home

All the kids were still there