LUMINARY PERSONAGE

 

Luminary personage

Of prominence

A bright light

In the firmament

Truly brilliant

Outshone only

By his achievements

POSH AND BECKS LOOKALIKES

 

Posh and Becks lookalikes

Could be their twin

But they go by the name

Of Thick and Thin

MANDELA

What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he opposed apartheid?
So what?
He wasn’t alone in that
That doesn’t make him great
That would make half the world great

What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he led the ANC’s military wing?
So what?
Not really the stuff of greatness
Just another bloody terrorist

What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it his twenty seven years in jail?
So what?
Murder and rape will achieve that
That doesn’t make him great

What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he symbolized the struggle?
A beacon against apartheid
So what?
That doesn’t make him great

What makes Mandela a great man?
Is it that he’s a nice silver haired old man?
With a warm affable smile
So what?
That could be my granddad

What makes him a great man?
Was it that he was the first black president?
Of a free South Africa
Very historic
But that alone doesn’t make him great

What makes Mandela a great man
Is his humility
His humanity
He could have spoken in vengeance
Yet he spoke of reconciliation
He could have evened the score
Balanced the books
For black South Africa
He could have unleashed
A black tide of death and destruction
Upon the white minority
Pay back
But he did not
Instead he spoke forgiveness
He could have been a Mugabe
And never relinquished power
But chose to serve only one term
Then handed on the baton
His work was done
His greatness set in stone

TIGER, TIGER – CHOICES

Tiger Woods was undecided,
Iron or wood that was the quandary
Eventually he settled on
A Fire hydrant followed by a tree

TIGER, TIGER - OUT AND ABOUT

Elin was asked what she and Tiger were doing
Out and about in the early hours of the morning
She said she couldn’t answer for Tiger
But for herself she was out clubbing

TIGER, TIGER - SHORT YARDAGE

Tiger can drive a golf ball
400 yards, effortlessly
But can only drive a car
Little more than three

TIGER, TIGER – TRAPPINGS

Being on the top of his sport
Tiger Woods is wealthy,
And he enjoys the trappings
Of being financially healthy
He has bought luxury cars
With what he has won
Once all in pristine condition
But now has a hole-in-one.

TIGER, TIGER – STROKE PLAY

Elin Woods admitted
Assaulting Tiger
“How many times”?
The police asked her
She thought for a moment
"I’m not sure exactly”
Then with a nod she said
“Mark me down for a three”

TIGER, TIGER – TIPS AND POINTERS

Elin’s phone hasn’t stopped
Since the tale hit the papers
Every golfer in the world
Wants to speak to her
To get some pointersOn how to beat Tiger

TIGER, TIGER – MUTUAL APPRECIATION CLUB

Tiger should now have
Sympathy for baby seals
With first hand knowledge
Of how they feel
As Tiger and the baby seal
Have in common
That they’ve both been clubbed
By a Scandinavian

TIGER, TIGER – THE TIGER

Tiger, Tiger, what a plight
Laying prone out like a light
What mortal hand blacked your eye?
And left you staring at the sky

What greater wounds would be
On your bruised and battered body
If your wife had on reflection
Thought carefully about her club selection