72 Miles From The Sea

Sunday, 18 June 2023

I was asked by a practising Buddhist

If I could remember any past lives

I replied I couldn’t confirm yesterday

Without consulting the archives

At a publishing place

I have to help a one armed

Typist do upper case

Do lazy people exercise?

I happen to think probably not

But if they did something

It would be a Diddly-squat

I said I wanted to be a comedian

And my wife laughed, the rotten cow

Well I have become a comedian

And I can say that no one’s laughing now

Today I added insult onto injury

To a recovering paragliding enthusiast

As they lay motionless in Casualty

When I wrote something rude on his cast

Buying a comb for a bald man

Is clearly the act of a misfit

It’s the unkindest gift of all

Which he’ll never part with it

I had a very disturbing dream last night

Which I awoke from in some distress

I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper

You might say I had been dicing with death