21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 425

 

Peter Piper picked a peck

Of pickled peppers

Very interesting I’m sure, but what

Was he picking at before hand?

MORNGY THURSDAY

 

At a soup kitchen, they ran out of food

Due to a basic error in their sums

And tempers flared among the homeless

In fact there were a lot of hot cross bums

ARE YOU WEARING KNICKERS?

 

Are you wearing Knickers?

Sorry I can’t hide my snickers

But beggars can’t be pickers

And I expect better from Vicars

PROVERBIAL PROVERBS # 3

 

Practice makes perfect

Is that the prerequisite?

Well for me and my girl

Practicing is the best bit

I ALWAYS MAKE THE EFFORT TO GO HOME

 

I always make the effort to go home

Though it fills me with dread to be clear

Two days of unwelcome parenting advice

From relatives I see once or twice a year

PEOPLE TRAVEL CONSIDERABLE DISTANCES

 

People travel considerable distances

To be with those they hold dear

Because these are the special people

They only see once or twice a year

But the realization that once or twice

Was way too much soon became clear

I WAS IN THE APPLE STORE

 

I was in the Apple Store being served when I loudly farted

And the sales guy got mad and we almost came to blows

More Apple staff and even other customers joined in

But it wasn’t my fault that they didn't have Windows