APPARENTLY ONE IN THREE KIDS # 2

 

Apparently one in three kids

Are conceived in an IKEA bed

But thankfully two out of three

Wait until they get home instead

TEENAGERS ARE LIKE CAVEMEN

 

Teenagers are like Cavemen

With their inappropriate rubbing

Personal hygiene, table manners

And their penchant for clubbing

WHEN THEY ARE STEPPED ON

 

When they are stepped on

Their behaviour is quite benign

The Grapes never say a word

But they do give a little whine

I PHONED THE DENTIST IN SOME DISTRESS

I phoned the dentist in some distress

And I had to get a bit shirty

The receptionist finally booked me

An appointment at Tooth Hurty.

STEP BROTHER

When I got home from work

My brother came into view

He was laying on the doorstep

But hey that’s Matt for you 

SOMEBODY TRASHED THE BIKE

Somebody trashed the bike

Of the school bully, Michael

It was after an anti-bullying lecture

Entitled “let’s break the cycle” 

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 380

 

Jack and Jill

Went up the hill

And at the summit

Jack does Jill