EXPERIENCED IN THE BEDROOM DEPARTMENT

 

I only dated my wife

Because I was told she was

“Experienced in the bedroom department”

Sadly it was gained

At Ikea over twenty years

Of course it was too late by then to lament

APPARENTLY ONE IN THREE KIDS # 2

 

Apparently one in three kids

Are conceived in an IKEA bed

But thankfully two out of three

Wait until they get home instead

APPARENTLY ONE IN THREE KIDS # 1

 

Apparently one in three kids

Are conceived in an IKEA bed

One in three chavs are conceived

In the stores toilets instead