A WOMAN, HAVING BURIED HER

 

A woman, having buried her

Philandering husband Dwight,

Said she had one consolation,

She knew where he was at night

AVOID MARRYING A GIRL CALLED ANN

 

Avoid marrying a girl called Ann

With every fibre and particle

Because if you marry her

She will be an indefinite article

A WOMAN’S FAVOURITE WORD

 

A woman’s favourite word

When all said and done

Doesn’t have to be special

It just has to be the last one

WHEN ACTOR FOGHORN LEGHORN

 

When actor Foghorn Leghorn

Retired to a farm near Leyton

Named his favourite he “Macduff”

Because he wanted her to lay on

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 375

 

Star light, star bright,

No, I don’t want to tonight

If truth be told, alright

I think stargazing is shite

ARE YOU WEARING BAGGY DUNGAREES?

 

Are you wearing baggy dungarees?

Oh yes, they’re the bee’s knees

And I can get inside them with ease

In fact, I can have them round your knees

Quicker than you can sneeze

Oh yes, I like your baggy dungarees

MY SON JOKES ABOUT MY AGE # 8

 

My son jokes about my age

Especially in front of his mates

He says that when I was at school

We had to write on slates