WHEN MY GRAN GOT OUT OF BED # 2

 

When my Gran got out of bed

After one too many tipples

She didn’t even notice that she

Was standing on her nipples

A FRUITFUL RELATIONSHIP

 

When I first dated my wife

Long ago in another life

I would get aroused watching her

Eating a banana

Now, thirty years later

It’s quite a different matter 

I only get exited watching her

If she chokes on the banana

BIRTHDAY TREAT

 

When your wife asks,

Which of her friends,

You would choose from,

To attend

Your birthday treat

And participate

In a threesome,

You shouldn’t hesitate

But a word of caution

When she asks you

Just give her the one name

And not two

DOMESTIC TIP

 

How do you turn on the dishwasher?

My friend asked me

I replied that in my house

Blowing in her ear was the key

HOUSE CALL

 

“How long have you been bedridden?”

The visiting doctor asked

The patient replied “well certainly not

Since my husband passed”

FOOD GROUPS

 

There are six food groups

When it comes to my kitchen

Canned, Boxed and Bagged

Jarred, Bottled and Frozen

A LOVING ATMOSPHERE

 

A loving atmosphere, at home,

Is such an important thing

A tranquil harmonious home

Is vital to your well being

Do all you can to create one

By not having offspring