THE CANDY MAN

 

He has had a very sweet tooth all of his life

He even found himself a rather sweet wife

He’d eat cream cakes and all kinds of sweeties

Now he has high cholesterol and type 2 diabetes

FEVERISH AGAIN AND AGAIN

 

That medical catastrophe

The flu pandemic

Is not as bad as expected

It’s not even an epidemic

A large number of reported cases

On closer examination

Were found to have been

Preceded by intoxication

This is a totally different strain

Of contagious flu

Which the W.H.O.

Has been renamed wine flu

WE’LL ALL BE KILLED

 

They tell us we are in the grip of another

Catastrophic climate crisis

That will drown the world

By melting the polar ices

Well if you are unconvinced

That the sword of doom is falling

Then you know the argument is weak

When data is replaced by name calling

Anyone not on message

Gordon Brown tells us in his piety

That we are no better

That the flat earth society

Well is it any wonder we are sceptics

When in the eighties we were told

By the doom Sayers

We would all die because of the hole

In the ozone layer

If we did not act we would kill

The polar bears and the Pandas

Well to be frank someone sold a lot of fridges

On the back of that propaganda

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 14

 

Jack and Jill

Went up the hill

They took with them a bucket

Jack made a play

Jill said “no way”

So he said to himself “oh bother”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY # 10

 

Congratulations and felicitations

But don’t drink too much at the celebration

For when you don’t know how many you’ve had

Can lead to you dancing like your Dad

PUT DOWN # 13

 

Put downs work the best

For deflecting unwanted attention

But try to be amusing

As this relieves the tension

“The look of you could stop a man’s heart”

May be his opening gambit

So just reply to him

“The look of you could stop traffic”

JUSTITIA

 

Justitia, or lady justice

Matronly Goddess

Stands for fairness

Validating justice

Sanctifying the law

A figure of trust

 

Before the court

She stands

Blindfolded

To mete out justice

Without fear of favour

Equality for all

In the eyes of the law

Impartiality

 

In Justitia’s left hand

The measuring balances

The scales of justice

Weighing the evidence

For and against

Support and opposition

Guilt and innocent

 

Justitia, in her right hand

Holds the sword

The symbol of power

Of reason and justice

A double edge sword,

The sword of justice

The nemesis sword

To be wielded for or against

Retribution or vengeance

 

Justitia, is a fraud

Justice is not blind

Rip off the blindfold

From the bitch’s eyes

She is not blind

She has no impartiality

She is the establishment

The ruling order

Her principled scales

Don’t measure justice

Only a rich man’s coin

And her noble sword

The sword of justice

The nemesis sword

Is used to smite the weak