“What is the chemical formula for water?”
The science teacher
said to young Joe
Joe confidently stood
up and replied
H, I, J, K, L, M, N,
O,
“That’s not even
close” the teacher shouted
Joe said “Last week
you said it was H to O”
Tuesday, 25 January 2022
SAY IT AINT SO
OFFSPRING
A woman knows all about her children
She knows their likes
and dislikes,
Who their friends are
and who they fancy
Their illness’s,
ailments and allergies
She knows the dates of
all their matches
Drop off and pick up,
Home and away
She knows about
appointments for hospital
As well as Doctor,
optical and dental
She knows about their
favourite foods
And the things that
make them sick
She knows what scares
them and why
And what makes them
laugh and cry
She knows all about their hopes and dreams
And what they may look for in a spouse
While a man on the other hand, is vaguely aware
AN ILL WIND
An elderly couple were in church
When about halfway
through,
May leant over and
whispered
In the ear of her
husband lou,
'I just let out a
silent fart
What do you think I
should do?'
'I think you should put
a new battery
In your hearing aid'
Replied Lou
THE NAKED TRUTH (2)
Mary stood naked before her husband
“What do you like most
about me?”
"What is it that
turns you on more,
My pretty face or my
sexy body?"
He perused her
nakedness briefly
"Your sense of
humour!" said hubby
Monday, 24 January 2022
ARE YOU WEARING ANY?
Are you wearing any?
Beneath your tartan
gear
Because if your kilt
flares up
There will be a
raucous cheer
HERALDING ITS ARRIVAL
Heralding its arrival
A lone piper suitably
bedecked
Leads the procession
To the hosts table
unchecked
It’s delivered to the
supper
With such deferential
respect
Then addressed and
served
Not to eat it shows
disrespect
Well if I’ve eaten
anything fouler
Then I truly cannot
recollect
ARE YOU WEARING A TARTAN SKIRT?
Are you wearing a Tartan skirt?
And what’s above your
socks?
If I were able to take
a look
I could maybe see the
Trossachs
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