IT’S THE DOGS…. ONCE AGAIN

 

George loved his wife Elsie dearly

They’d been married 40 years nearly

George loved her from the very first look

But sadly Elsie was a desperate cook

To her great credit it didn’t deter her

From preparing a variety of fare

One day she served something cordon bleu

Which caused George to sit and stare

It was truly awful even just to look at

Some burnt, some raw and swimming in fat

Reluctantly he took a taste of the presentation

And gave it to his dog without hesitation

Then immediately after eating some

The dog started licking at his bum

“Why is he doing that?" she said in disgust

As the dog did what all dogs must

George replied quite straight faced

“He’s trying to get rid of the taste”

HEALTH CLUB WARNING

I joined a health club last year

It cost two hundred pounds so quite dear

I haven’t lost a single pound

So as an investment not very sound

But it wasn’t their fault to be fare

Because apparently you have to go there

EXERCISE PLAN

 

My wife wants me to start taking exercise

But not for my own sake to be plain

The only reason she wants me to exercise

Is so she can hear heavy breathing again

MISTAKES

 

Don’t be afraid of making mistakes

I was taught as a kid

As long as you learn something

From the things you did

I have learnt a lot about mistakes

And now I’m in my prime

I find some mistakes are too much fun

To only make one time

GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS

 

Suzy the fluesy is fun in the Jacuzzi

Jude the prude is really rather rude

Tarty Marti is a must at a party

And silly Lily is a very frisky philly

 

Slender Brenda is really very tender

Whacky Jackie likes to smoke her backy

Crazy Daisy is perhaps a little lazy

And trendy Wendy is extremely bendy

 

Plain Jane is certainly not mundane

Immoral Coral has a tendency to quarrel

Handy Candy is often rather randy

And mean Jean is frankly just obscene

 

Steady Teddy is almost always ready

Bobbin Robin can get me throbbin

Shirty Gurty so easily gets flirty

But it’s rosy Rosie with whom I get cosy

I LOVE ANAGRAMS # 1

 

I love anagrams

Anagrams are great

Some are funny

Some light the gloom

For example

Dormitory = dirty room

ROYAL NAMES

 

If the royal family

Want respect from society

And to keep their number

Free from notoriety

It might have helped