LILY TOMLIN

 

Lily Tomlin always

Wanted to be somebody

She could have been

More specific probably

A paraphrasing of one of the great Lily Tomlin’s gags

MY BEST FRIEND COMES FROM A LONG LINE

 

My best friend comes from a long line

Of kleptomaniacs but he is the laziest of them

In fact he’s so lazy he could win an award

You really do have to hand it to him...

I WAS WATCHING A DOCUMENTARY ON TV

 

I was watching a documentary on TV

Last night about the viewing audience

And the decline in their attention spans

Well I watched some of it in my defense

THE SHARK DID THE DOLPHIN A FAVOR

 

The Shark did the Dolphin a favor

Though not a big one as favors go

And paid him back in cephalopods

Which was kind of Squid pro quo

I WOULD LOVE TO BE AN ACTOR

 

I would love to be an actor,

But it would be quite absurd

As I'd always forget the...

Oh dear, what is the word

ALL-TIME CLASSIC MOVIE FAVOURITES – THE MAN WHO SHOT LIBERTY VALANCE (1962)

 

“The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance” is a western drama, based on the story by Dorothy M. Johnson and Directed by John Ford.

While Senator Ransom Stoddard (James Stewart) returns home to Shinbone for the funeral of Tom Doniphon (John Wayne), he tells the story behind his sojourn to a local newspaper editor, about how he had arrives in the town many years before, as a young lawyer, and how he first met local outlaw Liberty Valance (Lee Marvin) when the stage he was on was robbed.

After the holdup Stoddard was left with nothing more than a few law books to his name so he had to get a job in the kitchen at the Ericson's restaurant and there he met his future wife, Hallie (Vera Miles) but he has both a friend and a love rival in Tom Doniphon.

All this is against the backdrop of the territory vying for Statehood.

Eventually Stoddard is selected by the townspeople as a representative, with his main rival being Valance, who does not take defeat well and terrorizes the town, but when he destroys the local newspaper office and attacks the editor, Stoddard calls him out, though the conclusion is not quite as straightforward as legend would have it.

Other notable cast members in this classic western are Edmond O'Brien, Andy Devine, Ken Murray, John Carradine and Jeanette Nolan.

GAIUS JULIUS CAESAR

 

Roman Politian Gaius Julius Caesar

The notorious Roman Geezer

Who was full of vinegar and starch

Met his end on the Ides of March