THE BOYS

 

The Police arrested two kids

One was drinking battery acid,

The other was eating fireworks.

No doubt a right pair of Berks

Now this is true though you may scoff

They charged one and let the other one off.

APPROVED PARKING

Somebody actually complimented me

On my driving today you see.

Now I don’t like to gloat

But they left a little note

On the windscreen of mine,

It simply said 'Parking Fine.'

DR GRACE

 

A man went to Doctor Grace’s

“I've hurt my arm in several places”

The man said clearly in pain

Doc Grace said “well don't go there again”

ALL-TIME CLASSIC MOVIE FAVOURITES – JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR (1973)

 

Jesus Christ Superstar is based on the Andrew Lloyd Webber/Tim Rice Rock Opera of the same name, directed by Norman Jewison.

It tells the story of the final 6 days in the life of Jesus Christ (Ted Neeley) seen primarily through the troubled eyes of Judas Iscariot (Carl Anderson)

Being filmed entirely on location in Israel lends the film an authenticity and the anachronistic manner of the sets, with contemporary weapons on display, such as at the Temple Market work like a bridge spanning two thousand years.

The songs are memorable and well performed in particular by Ted Neeley (Jesus) Carl Anderson (Judas) Yvonne Elliman (Mary Magdalene) Barry Dennen (Pontius Pilate) and Josh Mostel (King Herod)

It’s a must watch movie whether spiritually inclined or not.

WHATEVER HAPPENED

 

Whatever happened to Louis the umpteenth of France?

Whatever happened to Jensen Interceptors?

Whatever happened to tree top squash?

Whatever happened to indestructible Tonka Toys?

Whatever happened to my hopes and dreams?

Whatever happened to my plans and schemes?

Whatever happened to my hearts desires?

Whatever happened to Aunt Alice?

Whatever happened to the likely lads?

Whatever happened to baby Jane?

Whatever happened to standards of behaviour?

Whatever happened to community spirit?

Whatever happened to this bulldog breed?

Whatever happened to common courtesy?

Whatever happened to good manners?

Whatever Whatever

DEPARTMENTAL MAN

 

I liken men to Department Stores

Hear me out before you scoff

Men are like Department Stores

As their clothes are always half off

INTERNAL QUERY

 

Tell me ladies please tell me this

It’s a question that’s left me stressed 

Why does the gynaecologist

Leave the room while you get undressed?